In Filipino culture, family is the cornerstone of social life and personal identity. This deep-rooted value is reflected in the way Filipinos prioritize familial relationships above all else, fostering a strong sense of unity and support among family members.
The importance of family is particularly evident during various celebrations and gatherings, which serve as opportunities for loved ones to come together and strengthen their bonds. Family ties are celebrated through various occasions such as Christmas, New Year’s Eve, birthdays, and milestones like graduations or promotions. These gatherings are more than just events—they are cherished moments that strengthen bonds and create lasting memories.
In times of loss, the Filipino approach to mourning is characterized by a profound respect for the deceased and a commitment to honoring their memory. This is manifested in a variety of customs and superstitions that guide the mourning process. For instance, it is commonly believed that family members should refrain from bidding farewell or expressing gratitude to visitors at the wake, as doing so is thought to disrupt the spirit of the deceased. Additionally, bathing and cleaning during this period are discouraged, as these actions are believed to bring misfortune to both the departed and the grieving family.
The mourning process is marked by significant observances that reflect the Filipino belief in the spiritual journey of the soul. One key observance is “pa-siyam,” which takes place nine days after a loved one’s passing. During this time, family members gather to pray, creating a sacred space that signifies the soul’s presence before God. This gathering not only serves as a spiritual ritual but also as a means for family members to support one another in their shared grief. Following this, a 40-day period is observed, which is believed to represent the soul’s judgment day, further emphasizing the importance of prayer and reflection during this time.
The mourning rituals culminate in the first death anniversary, known as “Babang Luksa.” During Babang Luksa, the majority of family members wear black, which symbolizes mourning. But nowadays, some families just wear what they want as long as they commemorate the one year death anniversary of their departed loved one. While, the “padasal” novenas, rosary prayers, and the subsequent gatherings, often centered around food, serve as a significant rite of passage within the family. This occasion is particularly significant, as it provides family members with an opportunity to come together for one last prayer for their departed loved ones. It is a moment of closure, allowing them to honor the memory of the deceased while also celebrating the life they lived.
However, the observance of the deceased does not end with the first anniversary. Filipinos also participate in “Undas,” or the Day of the Souls, which occurs from October 31 to November 2. This period is dedicated to remembering and honoring those who have passed away. Families visit cemeteries or columbariums, bringing flowers, food, and other offerings as tokens of love and remembrance.
A mass card is often presented to confirm that prayers have been offered for the deceased, symbolizing the continuing bond between the living and the departed.
These practices not only honor the memory of loved ones but also strengthen family connections. Filipinos come together to reflect on the lives of those who have passed and to cherish the moments, both joyful and difficult, shared with them. The rituals and traditions surrounding death in Filipino culture are a testament to the enduring importance of family, even beyond life.
